Welcome 2009

I adore our connection and wish you:

A New Year minted from love

Gilded with courage

Dusted with wonder

Embraced by contradiction

Comfortable with discomfort

Tenderized by self-kindness

Held in the hands of our Source"

Jennifer Louden www.comfortqueen.com

Holiday On Ice

Anyone who knows me knows that I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Amy Grant. Ok, I will admit it, I am a fan-girl. For my birthday my cool mom bought tickets for the Holiday On Ice performance staring, you guessed it, AMY GRANT...oh yea, and Nancy Kerrigan, Michael W. Smith and some other skaters..... I did my best to take some pictures, but they are not all that clear. And since the event was being filmed for TV, I couldn't get up and take better shots. Here is what I have to share.

The Stage - it was really pretty

Nancy Kerrigan - she had a baby 3 months ago, so here jumps were not high up in the air, but she looked beautiful. My friend Barbara (also LaRae's cousin) and my mom. I had to sneak up and take my mom's picture since she does not like it much..... I like this picture as she was so enjoying herself and the skating and the company.

The blurry image in the middle is really Amy Grant. I truly love Christmas Music and I love her and skating is pretty cool too.....so, it was a perfect evening.

Amy has a new Christmas CD this year and on it she has written a new song called "I Need a Silent Night" and it is amazing...I'm a bit obsessed with it at the moment. On the CD, her 4 year old daughter Corina Grant-Gill reads the Savior's birth story from Luke and it is adorable. How cool to have your child's voice recorded for all time on a song you wrote and sang.

This is a YouTube video of Amy's new Christmas Song "I Need a Silent Night." It isn't a great quality video, so to read the lyrics, see my new widget on my blog.....Pretty cool and high tech, huh?

I hope a few of you caught the Holiday on Ice show this past Sunday at 1 pm PST....I used the trusty DVR to "tape" it for me and I've watched it a few times now, fast forwarding to Amy's parts. The show was great - fun to go out with my "girl-friends" .....just one comment...MORE AMY, less skating next time!!

Celebration of the day I was born

Howdy - I have lots to catch up on.... Let's start with pictures from my birthday weekend - Me at 43 Dinner at White Chocolate Grill --- gotta love a place that has desert on the menu before anything else! Seared Ahi Tuna - my favorite!! Sharing some volcanic chocolate thing with my man Then on Sunday - Dinner at my folks - Steak, Artichoke, twice baked potatoes and.....

Desert at my parents on Sunday - Texas Sheet Cake - delish!

And to top off a perfect night --

a few hours of Aggravation (do you remember this game?) I found this one on eBay...and we play every week.

"I got a crush on Obama"

Today is the day we have been waiting for and it is getting pretty exciting. I have not been shy about my support for Mr. Obama. The words; "I got a crush on Obama" has been sung by me often. I admire his integrity, his fighting for what he has believed in and for staying the course throughout his life. His life's beginning has been of interest to me as I find that in my work I see people who come from poverty, disadvantage and struggle can go either way - they either brake out of their disadvantage or they continue to find struggle and disadvantage. It depends on attitude. Attitude determines their altitude. My parents and I have had many disagreements over this election. When I was 18 and went to register to vote my dad said, "Don't come home a democrat," so even though that is the party I wanted to join, I registered republican and stayed a republican until 2006 - then I took the leap and became a democrat as my support and friendship with Dina Titus was strong. So, here I am, a democrat, watching the election returns with hope and with a greater excitement than I have felt in quite some time. 8 pm Pacific time....Hello Mr. President Elect Obama! (TEARS)

Bonanza Homecoming 2008

Here are the photos from Grant's Homecoming night. These are the pictures of him and his date, Michele, (his girlfriend...how does my son have a girlfriend that is not ME?!) She is a very nice girl who we really like and who is the female equivalent of Grant. She is a Theatre Major at Las Vegas Academy and they don't see each other all that much due to their busy lives, but when they do, they enjoy each other's company. Here are some pictures from Michele's home when Grant picked her up. (Do you like how I went too to take pictures?)

Grant and Michele

Homecoming was on a cold night for October

Grant and Michele at her mom's home before the dance

Grant in front of his bedroom door - which is full of quotes he loves - he got this idea from the late Randy Pausch

Isn't he so handsome!?

Bonanza Homecoming 2008 - Part I - Our "Son" Grant

A tradition during Bonanza High School homecoming for the Senior Boys to be the cheerleaders at the powderpuff football game. Grant made one 'cute' "Lady-Man" and was fun to watch him cheer and jump in a skirt.

Boys as Girls

Grant doing a pose at home

A face only his mother could love.....

More pictures from the dance and with his date to follow......

A Nevada Saturday

Yesterday Devin and I took a drive out to Boulder City to see the Nevada State Animal. (do you know what it is....?) Correct: It is the Desert Bighorn Sheep

This guy sat there and seemed to be posing for those who wanted to take his picture.

When we first saw the sheep, they were next to the highway and not in the park where they often are. There were cars stopping for people to see them and take their pictures. Then, a black, dark tinted windowed car with a dashboard siren and light came and slowly drove near the sheep, honking his siren so that they would move away from the highway and back up to the park where they spend September. It was one of those "Only in Nevada" moments..."Only in Nevada do Bighorn Sheep get herded by an undercover shepherd in a Crown Victoria."

Devin with Lake Mead in the distance. Devin went water skiing for the first time a few weeks back and loved the lake. He has been begging for our family to buy a boat ever since. Not gonna happen.

Me in front of the park in Boulder City where the Sheep hang out. Funny thing about the park this Saturday. There was a group of folks there

setting up for a wedding. Another, "Only in Nevada" moment. "Only in Nevada can you have a wedding in a park attended by Desert Bighorn Sheep."

Look at this guy's horns! Beautiful.

If you have the time, take the kids out to Boulder City to see the Desert Bighorn Sheep. They totally ignore the people watching them and it is a beautiful way to spend a few hours viewing some majestic animals.

Home Means Nevada to Me.

The Heart of the Matter

For the past 3 days I spent my time here....

Not exactly what I had planned for a Tuesday morning, but nevertheless, I had to let go of my control and listen to my body.

On the way to work, I began having chest pains. Now, I have had this pain before, but never like I had it on Tuesday. So, I went to my office and the pain continued...and I felt really, really bad. I had my co-worker drive me to the hospital emergency room.

I walked in, filled out the paperwork for chest pain and the fun began. I was hooked up to a heart monitor, given nitroglycerin, atavan (anti-anxiety medication) and laid in the bed..waiting. After a while, my pain subsided and I felt better. The doctor came in, reviewed everything and said, "I think we will keep you overnight and run some tests..." I thought, "Don't you know I am busy? I have no time for this!"

So, needless to say, I spent 3 days in the hospital and had numerous tests all to find out that my heart needed a break. (well, that is not the official diagnosis, but it is my own for myself) My heart is OK, but needs to see the cardiologist for follow up care.

I had a good time to reflect and to listen to my body - it needed to rest. I have been going 110% for a long time and I know that I need to slow down. This was my body's way of saying, "Hey, I need a break. You are NOT Wonder Woman!"

Interesting how this all came to be for me. I have just started my 600 hours of student therapy to graduate and I have 2 jobs, 2 kids, 3 dogs, housework, a new church calling and a husband I pay attention to on occasion.... (he got my full attention in the hospital as he sat with me every day - his boss banned him from working while I was sick) I have known for a long time that my health was slipping, that my body was tired, that I feel worn out a lot, I don't sleep enough, but I kept telling myself that it is only until July 09.... Guess my body thought 9/08 was time to stop for a moment.

So today, I am busy making follow up doctor appointments, resting, wearing pajamas at 11:31 pm and taking it easy. I am also banned from my job until Monday. Nice, actually, not to have to do something today. First day in a long time.

I am thankful to my body and to God who allowed me to understand what I need to do for me while I rested for 3 days in Desert Springs. I am thankful for a husband who still loves me despite my busy life and lack of time for him. I am thankful for 2 boys whose faces told the fear that their voices would not say when they saw me in the bed with contraptions hooked up to me. They need me and I need them. So, I'll stick around a while longer, take better care of my heart and my body and remember that the beach is only 4 hours away.

ARE YOU READY??!!!

It is finally time. There is a crispness in the air, there is an excitement in people that happens only in September...NFL football is BACK! I love football. Especially NFL football. Sure, I like college football (especially the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame) and I even like high school football - Go Bengals! - But there is nothing to compare to NFL football.

My team is the Indianapolis Colts. My husbands is the Minnesota Vikings, Grant loves the Green Bay Packers (he is undecided about this whole Brett Favre situation) and Devin, he likes the Baltimore Ravens, though he does not watch with the excitement of his mother. Our family participates for fun in an online game where we pick the winners. We enjoy seeing who is the best at picking the winners ... it is a fun family activity.

Oh - gotta go - the game is on!

THE Peyton MANning

Back to School 2008 - Firsts and Lasts

Well, the first day of school came and it has passed....and for me, 'the mom,' I feel a mix of excitement, sadness, nostalgia and 'Am I really this old?"

Grant started his SENIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL and Devin started his FIRST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL!!

Here are a few pictures of the day (not taken before school as seminary starts at 5:50 in the A.M!!) We took the pictures after school had ended for the day! Devin - the 9th grader, reporting for duty Grant - Senior Mentor for Bonanza High School Grant - "Ok mom, enough with the pictures..." My boys - High School Students (How did this happen to ME??)

The Healing Choice

In the wake of betrayed intimacy, you may feel nauseated, angry, humiliated, desperate. Why am I not enough for him? Can our marriage be saved—and do I even want to try? Will this unbearable ache ever go away? Amid the devastation that follows a spouse’s sexual disloyalty, you need to know that you are not alone. God walks alongside you, offering comfort and a promise to transform the pain of the present into hope for the future. In addition, there is a community of women who know firsthand the agony caused by a husband’s sexual compromises and who offer the compassion, strength, and biblical wisdom you need to make healthy decisions for yourself and your family. The Healing Choice reveals the hope-filled stories of two such women, authors Brenda Stoeker and Susan Allen, who draw on their own experiences and those of many others to offer step-by-step advice for rediscovering intimacy with God and finding the support you need to move toward genuine spiritual and emotional restoration. Their down-to-earth insights light the path toward help and healing for every woman who longs to move beyond the pain of broken trust and experience God’s promise of hope

Janet's review -

I enjoyed this book from a therapist's perspective. It is full of ways to 'let go and let God' carry the burden of a dying loved one and a husband who has strayed. Often people become angry with God and push Him away first before looking at the situation and having faith that God knows how it will all turn out, even before it happened.

I was touched by the honesty and openness of these two women in sharing their life's struggle and heartache.

Again -I have one to give a way - send me your address (Micalanne, I still need yours for the last book) and I'll send you a copy!

Incomplete - I am in LOVE with this song

Do you ever buy a CD and one song just jumps into your soul and stays there as a reminder that there is something in your life that is going on and you didn't even know that this 'something' was there waiting for you to work out? Well, that is what this song by Alanis Morissette has done to me. I am in love with this song, but at the same time, I feel so strongly that I have some 'relationship-with-God-stuff to work out.' Often, I get in this place and often, I fight until I can not fight with my heart anymore - giving in and allowing myself to re-connect and not question. I am not a person who gives my whole self to the will of God easily. In fact, I fight and struggle with the idea of "God" and just want God to be with me without me having to do and give and struggle. Does anyone understand what I am saying here?

Anyway, I love the song - can not get enough of it - want to be a friend to friends who know how to be friends - and this desire for friendship includes God.

Be open. Listen.

Love As A Way of Life by Dr. Gary Chapman

It is time for a book review!

"It is impossible to succeed without love." Dr. Gary Chapman

Dr. Gary Chapman's new book Love As a Way of Life speaks directly to my heart. I have felt for as long as I remember that if we as a human species could just offer love to each other in a non-judgemental, God centered way, our world could heal itself. Now, this book confirms how I have felt and the way I have tried to offer myself to the planet for me. This book, Love As a Way of Life is the follow up to The Five Love Languages and offers seven traits that lead to loving relationships.

These traits are:

1) Kindness

2) Patience

3) Forgiveness

4) Courtesy

5) Humility

6) Generosity

7) Honesty

Each chapter is full of suggestions and reasons that these traits are so important for us to cultivate and develop in our relationships. I especially liked the chapter on courtesy. How 'missing' is this trait in our day to day dealings with those whom we come in contact with daily? VERY!

The last few chapters are on making love a way of life in Marriage, Parenting and the Workplace. There are also quizzes and exercises to 'test' your levels in each of the seven areas.

I highly recommend this book as one that will enhance your day to day living of life and will give you a deeper insight into your own behavior as you interact in relationships.

I have one to give away....just be the first to say in a comment "I want more love" and I'll send you a copy.

Grant-E's Big Adventure

Grant was able to go on a 2 week Church History Trip with Latter Day Tours. Our house was pretty quiet without him here, but he had a great experiences and loved seeing new cities and sites. Here are a few of his pictures! Enjoy!! Sacred Grove Palmyra Temple - cool sky! John Lennon memorial Central Park Liberty Bell - through a window to avoid the line! (that is my boy) WWII memorial - every state who sent troops has a wreath Acting like a Canadian on the Maid of the Mist tour Niagara Falls - Canadian Side Ground Zero from the bus - NYC Hill Cumorah Original Book of Mormon transcript

way behind in the life of my blog

Well....I clicked over to my own blog for a change and found that it has been longer than I remembered since I had visited here. I can't believe that life has zoomed by so quickly and somehow left me holding on for all I am worth!

The things I promised to update about a few posts ago are 'old news' by now, and I am not sure what the point in posting it all would be.

But, I will share a few Snoopy the Musical photos as it was so much fun for this truly INTROVERTED mom to watch her truly EXTROVERT actor of a son sing, dance and "become" Snoopy!

Snoopy (aka Grant)

The Cast...singing the finale

Grant and his biggest fan....Devin.

The best MAN won

State of my Life

I have been over here at my computer desk dutifully working on homework for the past 3 hours. My brain and my bottom are tired, but for different reasons!

I have so many things that I could share with you, my friends, I just don't know where to start.

I have been very blessed lately. I have been led by the Spirit and I have been supported in decisions I have made about my life. I am making a huge move in my career and I am scared to death, yet thrilled for the new adventure.

I only have 2 more classes in Grad School. Can you say "FINALLY?"

My eldest son learned about the power of prayer and of the Priesthood. He embodied Snoopy. I was so proud (pictures later)

My youngest son went away for 24 hours with his school group to CA to play his violin at the Music in the Park festival. He had a blast and I didn't worry for the entire 24 hours.....another miracle! (sorry, no pictures)

My husband is a good man. He is patient and he is kind. He still likes me and we celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary. (again, sorry, no pictures)

My dogs are cute. But, we all knew that! (silly me)

My parents are funny - (my mom has no wrinkles to speak of at 73...this is for LaRae) I do have wrinkles at 42. I was thinking of Laurie Koelliker- she is 52 and looks 32...how does she do that? (I digress....)

I will post photos, updates and follow through on these teasers.....soon.

I promise.

Oh, and I like David Cook....for the WIN!! (but I like Top Chef better!!)

Say good night Gracie. Good Night.

Happy 14th Devin

Devin and his favorite gift from his Grandpa....Jelly Beans!

My 'baby' is now 14!! He was ordained a teacher yesterday. He looked so tall and grown up next to our Bishop on the stand. I remember when he was 8 and had been baptised ~ he refused to go on the stand as he was too shy! He has grown up a lot since then. He isn't so shy anymore. Enjoy a few pictures of his day. We made him wait until after Church at 4 pm to open his presents. He was quite patient, until Church ended and then he said in the lobby, quite loudly, "Let's Roll!! There are presents waiting for me to rip thme open!"

That is our little man Devin...so glad he is mine!